Van Helsing Gross Dissection Lab by Jakks Pacific Toy Review by Andrew Lenahan
Series Overview:
Jakks Pacific Inc, best known for their wrestling figures, licensed the Van Helsing property, based on the 2004 summer movie with Hugh Jackman. Before its release, it looked quite likely that Van Helsing would be a solid blockbuster hit, but the movie proved disappointing, due at least partially to the fact that it was really hilariously awful. The toys, to put it charitably, are a mixed bag, ranging from somewhat decent to laughably terrible.
Toy Overview:
Dissection labs and such have long been a popular subject for boys' toys, and parents are often willing to buy anything with even vague potention for education. If Junior asks for a Gross Dissection lab at age 7, it'll be a microscope at age 12, a scanning electron microscope at age 15, and an MIT scholarship at 18. Or so they hope.
Even if we set science aside, Jakks Pacific really dropped the ball on this one. The idea is great... what better license for a gross lab toy than a film starring Frankenstein? Even Dracula and the Wolfman have gorydissection potential. All we get, though, is a pod with a little bat creature in it. You put the bat in the pod, "slice it open" (there's a pre-cut slit) and there you go. That's about it.
Toy Sculpt and Paint: 3
One of the good things about the movie and most of the action figures is the stylized gothic look. It wasn't a great film by any means, not was the visual look even spectacularly original, but careful thought was obviously put into it and it came out looking the part at least. The dissection lab, unfortunately, eschews the gothic look for generic sci-fi instead. The lab table that comes with the Wolfman in this very same toy line is far better looking than this! To make things even worse, the paint job is among the sloppiest I've ever encountered. The average Pinewood Derby car is painted better than this hunk of plastic.
Movement and Action Features: 2
The main feature here is a microscope-like appendage which moves pivots up and down and can also shift forward slightly. Unfortunately, it provides almost no magnification. There are also arms to hold the dissection subject to the table, which move in two places each, but very awkwardly and with little range of motion. There is also a velcro strap in case the arms cannot hold the subject to the table, which is almost always. Finally, there's a small drawer under the table. It's easy to open and close, but can only hold the tweezers, not the bat or even the scalpel.
Accessories: 4
The main accessory, the bat pod, is from the movie (not content just to rehash the classic Universal monsters, they had to ressurect Aliens as well). It essentially looks like a big green brain and is painted poorly with lighter green accents. The two tools provided are tweezers which work reasonably well and a pathetic scalpel. The scalpel is odd because it's not sharp enough for cutting but it's pointed and could be used as a poking weapon. Also included is a bag of purple-pink slime. I'm not sure whether the choice of purple rather than green should be considered a good thing or a bad thing. Green would look much better oozing out of the green brainlike pod, but purple is much less cliche. I've saved the best accessory--by far--for last. It's a little pygmy bat. It's not articulated, but it's a great sculpt and has a nice paint job. The same pygmy bat is also included with some of the Dracula figures.
Packaging: Average
A cardboard box. Functional, nothing special. Couldn't realistically have expected anything more (or less).
Overall score: 3
We could've dissected Frankenstein or the Wolfman and they give us a bat pod?! This is far from being the worst toy in history, but it may well be one of the biggest missed opportunities. A highly dissapointing toy, I can't even really say this is recommended for Van Helsing fans, because I asked them and they both have it already.
Availability:
If you really must have it, you can get it, and cheaply. As of this review, they're common at Toys R Us in the US, where our review sample was bought at 90% off, less than a dollar-fifty. They're also on Amazon.
Jakks Pacific Inc, best known for their wrestling figures, licensed the Van Helsing property, based on the 2004 summer movie with Hugh Jackman. Before its release, it looked quite likely that Van Helsing would be a solid blockbuster hit, but the movie proved disappointing, due at least partially to the fact that it was really hilariously awful. The toys, to put it charitably, are a mixed bag, ranging from somewhat decent to laughably terrible.
Toy Overview:
Dissection labs and such have long been a popular subject for boys' toys, and parents are often willing to buy anything with even vague potention for education. If Junior asks for a Gross Dissection lab at age 7, it'll be a microscope at age 12, a scanning electron microscope at age 15, and an MIT scholarship at 18. Or so they hope.
Even if we set science aside, Jakks Pacific really dropped the ball on this one. The idea is great... what better license for a gross lab toy than a film starring Frankenstein? Even Dracula and the Wolfman have gorydissection potential. All we get, though, is a pod with a little bat creature in it. You put the bat in the pod, "slice it open" (there's a pre-cut slit) and there you go. That's about it.
Toy Sculpt and Paint: 3
One of the good things about the movie and most of the action figures is the stylized gothic look. It wasn't a great film by any means, not was the visual look even spectacularly original, but careful thought was obviously put into it and it came out looking the part at least. The dissection lab, unfortunately, eschews the gothic look for generic sci-fi instead. The lab table that comes with the Wolfman in this very same toy line is far better looking than this! To make things even worse, the paint job is among the sloppiest I've ever encountered. The average Pinewood Derby car is painted better than this hunk of plastic.
Movement and Action Features: 2
The main feature here is a microscope-like appendage which moves pivots up and down and can also shift forward slightly. Unfortunately, it provides almost no magnification. There are also arms to hold the dissection subject to the table, which move in two places each, but very awkwardly and with little range of motion. There is also a velcro strap in case the arms cannot hold the subject to the table, which is almost always. Finally, there's a small drawer under the table. It's easy to open and close, but can only hold the tweezers, not the bat or even the scalpel.
Accessories: 4
The main accessory, the bat pod, is from the movie (not content just to rehash the classic Universal monsters, they had to ressurect Aliens as well). It essentially looks like a big green brain and is painted poorly with lighter green accents. The two tools provided are tweezers which work reasonably well and a pathetic scalpel. The scalpel is odd because it's not sharp enough for cutting but it's pointed and could be used as a poking weapon. Also included is a bag of purple-pink slime. I'm not sure whether the choice of purple rather than green should be considered a good thing or a bad thing. Green would look much better oozing out of the green brainlike pod, but purple is much less cliche. I've saved the best accessory--by far--for last. It's a little pygmy bat. It's not articulated, but it's a great sculpt and has a nice paint job. The same pygmy bat is also included with some of the Dracula figures.
Packaging: Average
A cardboard box. Functional, nothing special. Couldn't realistically have expected anything more (or less).
Overall score: 3
We could've dissected Frankenstein or the Wolfman and they give us a bat pod?! This is far from being the worst toy in history, but it may well be one of the biggest missed opportunities. A highly dissapointing toy, I can't even really say this is recommended for Van Helsing fans, because I asked them and they both have it already.
Availability:
If you really must have it, you can get it, and cheaply. As of this review, they're common at Toys R Us in the US, where our review sample was bought at 90% off, less than a dollar-fifty. They're also on Amazon.
posted by Andrew Lenahan at 10:49 PM
1 Comments:
I haven't played with this one yet....but do I really want to? Maybe we can get all our Van Helsing characters together and reinact the worst movie ever! No wait....it wasn't nearly as bad as "Manos, Hands of Fate"! Probably just as entertaining though.
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